The Lies We Believe
By Dr. Chris Thurman Psychologist, Minirth-Meier Clinic

To accompany 1999 Edition of Book from Amazon

Workbook by Dr. Linda A. Ratcliff, Th.D., Ed.D.



PART 1: The Lies We Believe


PART 2: Telling Ourselves the Truth

CHAPTER 1: The Truth About the Lies We Believe   CHAPTER 7: The Truth About the Truth
CHAPTER 2: Self-Lies   CHAPTER 8: To Err is Human
  1. "I Must Be Perfect."   CHAPTER 9: You Can’t Please Everyone
  2. “I Must Have Everyone’s Love and Approval.”   CHAPTER 10: There Is No Gain Without Pain
  3. "It is Easier to Avoid Problems Than to Face Them.”   CHAPTER 11: You Don’t “Have To” Do Anything
  4. “I Can’t Be Happy Unless Things Go My Way.”   CHAPTER 12: Virtue Lies in the Struggle, Not the Prize
  5. “My Unhappiness Is Somebody Else’s Fault.”   CHAPTER 13: Life Is Difficult
CHAPTER 3: Worldly Lies   CHAPTER 14: You Reap What You Sow
  1. “You Can Have It All.”   CHAPTER 15: You Are Not Entitled to Anything
  2. “My Worth is Determined by My Performance.”   CHAPTER 16: Emotional Pain Is Good
  3. “Life Should Be Easy.”   CHAPTER 17: You Are Going To Die
  4. “Life Should Be Fair.”   CHAPTER 18: Is There An Ultimate Source of Truth?
  5. “You Shouldn’t Have To Wait for What You Want.”   CHAPTER 19: The Truth About God and You
  6. “People Are Basically Good.”   CONCLUSION: How To Defeat Your Lies
CHAPTER 4: Marital Lies      
  1. “All My Marital Problems Are My Spouse’s Fault.”      
  2. “If Our Marriage Takes Hard Work, We Must Not Be Right for Each Other.”      
  3. “My Spouse Can and Should Meet All of My Emotional Needs.”      
  4. “My Spouse Owes Me (For All I Do).”      
  5. “I Shouldn’t Have To Change Who I Am To Make Our Marriage Better.”      
  6. “My Spouse Should Be Like Me.”      
CHAPTER 5: Distortion Lies      
  1. “A Mountain Out of a Molehill”      
  2. “Personalization: Taking Everything Personally”      
  3. “Polarization: Making Everything Black or White"      
  4. “Selective Abstraction: Missing the Forest for the Trees”      
  5. “Overgeneralization: History Always Repeats Itself”      
  6. “Emotional Reasoning: Feelings Equal Facts”      
CHAPTER 6: Religious Lies      
  1. “God’s Love Must Be Earned.”      
  2. “God Hates the Sin and Sinner.”      
  3. “Because I’m a Christian, God Will Protect Me From Pain and Suffering.”      
  4. “All My Problems Are Caused by My Sins.”      
  5. “It is My Christian Duty to Meet All the Needs of Others.”      
  6. “A Good Christian Doesn’t Feel Angry, Anxious or Depressed.”      
  7. “God Can’t Use Me Unless I’m Spiritually Strong.”      

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